Praying for Our Nation and It's New Leader

Today is the inauguration day for our newly elected president. We are commanded in Scripture to pray for our leaders and to submit to their authority, although we remember that we are citizens of heaven, foreigners in this world. President Obama has asked Rick Warren to pray at the inauguration. Since Obama's stated goal of choosing Warren was to be inclusive to all people (he also chose Episcopal Bishop V. Gene Robinson to participate), there is fear from many that Warren will not pray for godly repentance for this nation and for the president to lead us by the truth of God's Word. While it would be extraordinarily challenging to speak bold truth in front of millions, I pray that Pastor Warren will offer a faithful, repentant prayer for our president and our nation, even if it costs him his popularity.

As I was searching the internet, I found a few people who offered prayers for our nation and it's new president on his inauguration day:

John Frame
Chris Brauns
Dan Phillips
Albert Mohler
Mark Altrogge
J.D. Hatfield
Nicholas Jackson

What will you pray for this nation. Pray that Rick Warren will be bold as he approaches the throne of God for our nation and remember to pray often for our new president; first that his name is written in the Lamb's book of life and that he leads this country into godliness.

Ever think that someone in the church is needlessly antagonistic? The presence of antagonists is never healthy, but is invariably harmful to the church and its leadership. Kenneth Haugk in “Antagonists in the Church” describes an antagonist this way. Antagonists are individuals who, on the basis of no substantive evidence, go out of their way to make insatiable demands, usually attacking the person or performance of others. These attacks are selfish in nature, tearing down rather than building up, and are frequently directed against those in a leadership capacity. Recent literature in the area of conflict resolution has begun to recognize that there are individuals who initiate and thrive on unhealthy conflict, persons who have no desire whatsoever to see conflict resolved.

Regarding the unique congregational structures and how they contribute to antagonism, Mr. Haugk writes this. For too long, congregations how been places where antagonists can operate with success. Their behavior is not as successful in many other areas of life because in those areas it is simply not tolerated. ….Why has there been antagonism in churches? Because too often people have felt that antagonists had to be placated…. when someone with antagonistic tendencies takes hold of issues, the result is often destructive and divisive. The antagonist is usually not interested in the issues themselves; they are only a means to his or her own peculiar end. (pg 39)

In regard to the passive silence and apathy of a congregation, he says that when a congregation is attacked, it needs a very vocal group of people who are willing to confront the antagonists directly in order to give them the firm message that their behavior will not be tolerated. As long as the majority of people silently sit by, thinking the pastor will take care of it and it’s not their fight, the more encouraged the antagonists are, and the more they accelerate their attack. He speaks too of the extreme loneliness a pastor under attack experiences when individuals tell him privately they support him, yet will not take a stand and support him publicly or rebuke the attackers. He writes, “Silent supporters are no supporters”. The essential point that he makes, which is not intuitive to most people, is that an attack against a pastor is virtually never a problem with the pastor, but with the congregation that allows it to happen, by their silence.

When one individual assumes the whole burden of dealing with an antagonist, the result is rarely healthy. The obligation to deal with the situation properly resides in the corporate leadership of the congregation and, to a lesser extent, in the congregation as a whole. (pg 23)

What happens during an attack? The most immediate and obvious effects are that attendance in a previously growing congregation drops off precipitously, and interest in evangelism becomes almost non-existent. People on the fringes of congregational life do not want to be involved in the conflict, and almost everyone loses interest in bringing others into the congregation because of the tense atmosphere and shame people feel because of the attackers and their ungodly behavior. However, the antagonists then jump on the fact that attendance is down, and try to lay the blame for this on the pastor, when it is in actual fact the inevitable result of their own actions.

He discusses many distinguishing characteristics and “red flags” that can let a congregation know when they are faced with an antagonist. There are too many to list here, but a few worth mentioning include
a) a previous track record of antagonism toward church leaders and pastors,
b) bringing “concerns” to church leadership on behalf of “unnamed others” who have somehow chosen to confide in them, and
c) flaunting their financial donations and making a point of letting others know that they are not giving as much to the church because of “the situation”.

He then points out early and late warning signs of an imminent attack by an antagonist, as follows:

Early warning signs:
• A chill in the relationship
• Honeyed “concerns”
• Nettlesome questions
• Mobilizing forces and pot-stirring
• Meddling
• Resistance
Later warning signs:
• Sloganeering – (“There is not enough love in the congregation”)
• Accusing
• Spying
• Distorting
• Misquoting scripture
• “Judas kissing”
• Smirking
• Pestering
• Letter writing
• Pretense
• Lobbying (pg 63-66)

The author warns that, when these warnings signs begin to be seen, especially in antagonists who have a long track record of being antagonistic to every pastor and leader the church has had, an attack is imminent. Something must be done to stop the attack before it happens, for antagonists are never satisfied with their small victories. On the contrary, every perceived success only reinforces and emboldens them, so that each subsequent attack become more vicious and more harmful to the leader who is attacked and to the congregation.

Effects of antagonism on the church

“By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another” (John 13:35).

When arguing and antagonism wrack a congregation, its witness to the God of love is destroyed. Antagonists choose not to live out the love of Christ. Strife is introduced in love’s place, and with strife goes jealousy and anger. The primary effect of antagonism on God’s people is destruction. Visible expressions of the unconditional love of Christ are among the first casualties of active antagonism. Antagonism destroys the unique, loving witness of Christians and the vitality of the congregation, calling forth God’s anger.

Treatment for antagonism

“I urge you, brothers, to watch out for those who cause divisions and put obstacles in your way that are contrary to the teaching you have learned. Keep away from them” (Romans 16:17).

This is always the first step toward dealing with antagonism: watch out for it, be aware of it. The apostle Paul did not leave to his readers’ imaginations whom they were to watch. They were to watch for those who created dissension and caused divisions.

The Bible speaks definitively about the final treatment for those who persist in causing division and heartache in the church: “Warn a divisive person once, and then warn him a second time. After that, have nothing to do with him. You may be sure that such a man is warped and sinful; he is self-condemned” (Titus 3:10,11).

Dismissing someone should not be done lightly. But the words “have nothing to do with him” are a clear-cut response to an individual who persists in divisiveness after the first and second warnings. Paul told Titus not to engage in extensive attempts to smooth things over with the troublemaker; he was simply to avoid having anything to do with that person.

The apostolic guideline is clear: When confronted with an antagonist, face the probability that change simply will not occur. He is “self-condemned.” Stay away from that person.

This is the kind of book every congregation hopes it will never have to read. But all are reminded by the author of the importance of recognizing and dealing with harmful behavior.

What's My Motive?

As I have worked through the first few joyous weeks of my baby girl’s life, I have been doing a lot of self-examination and reflection on life. I have often struggled to find out what I wanted to become in life. I have been a graphic artist, obtained an education and employment in civil engineering, and even begun taking seminary courses. Each month I spend some time looking through job postings looking for something that might be a more fulfilling career. I have been blessed with multiple talents and could choose from quite a variety of interests, but nothing gives me the desire to work at and be the best at it. Except for one thing; my family.

For as long as I can remember, I wanted to be a husband and a dad. When I was little and helped take care of my brothers and sister, my parents often told me how great I was doing and what a good dad I would become. All through school I saw people dating each other for no apparent reason. I couldn’t understand why people were dating without serious consideration about whether that person was to be the one they would pledge their life to. I was determined to find that special girl and love her like no one has loved his wife before and become the best dad the world has ever seen.

All of this history brings me to today. I have been married to Molly for a couple weeks over three years; after dating for 5 ½ years. We were just blessed seven weeks ago with a beautiful baby girl who is now starting to smile at her daddy. I find myself, without much thought at all, sacrificing the things I once enjoyed to make sure my little girl taken care of. My pile of books to be read has been temporarily set aside for reading on biblical parenting.

Which has led me to great conviction. I suddenly realize more than before that as the head of this family, I bear the responsibility to lead my wife and children in godliness; to model Christ and teach His word to my family regularly. To me, it’s not as overwhelming as it is for some people because this is something I always wanted and prepared for. However, I am now asking myself why I wanted these things.

When I was a child, I wanted children to be a good dad and get praise from my parents. When I was a teenager, I wanted a girlfriend to fulfill my own personal longings and to make all the other girls jealous that they weren’t with me (trust me, nobody in high school was ever jealous of me). I wanted a wife who would be proud to boast of her great husband and children who thought the world of their dad. I wanted people to ask me for advice on marriage and parenting asking me, “How do you do it?”

When I now ask myself “why,” I see that on the surface I may have looked polished, respectable, kind, and loving. On the inside, it was all for selfish motives. While many others benefited, I looked for personal gratification and praise. It was all me-centered. The One who created marriage, who gives the blessing of children, who established the family, did it for His glory and His honor and His praise.

God created marriage to be a reflection of the love between Him and His church. God created families to share the love He has for His creation and to make more people to worship Him. He gives us roles in the family to understand love through submission to each other. He teaches through the family to respect authority even when we sometimes disagree so that we learn to respect and surrender to His ultimate authority. It is all designed for us to see Him through it all.

Today, as I learn (some by studying, some by trial and error) to be a husband and daddy, I must continue to ask myself, “Why am I doing this?” Why do I want children? Why do I send my children to school? Why do I teach them to say “Please” and “Thank You”? Why do I want them to eat their vegetables, brush their teeth, and go to bed at night?

While I do benefit from godliness, the ultimate purpose of my family is to glorify Christ in our love for each other and our obedience to Him; and to guide our children to become worshippers of the Most High God.

What motives do you have for pursuing the things that consume your time? Is it for your own fulfillment or for God’s glory?

Colossians 3:17 And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

1 Corinthians 10:31 So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.